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Derbyshire- (see Another Derbyshire for details) It was a long walk. I walked a long way. I was tired. The headlights scorched my arse. The valley view was in darkness and seemed faintly menacing. I imagined the menace. The yokels greeted me - grated on me. They had spiky noses and naked ears. I started to wonder if the walk had been worth it. It had. I could never be sure. There was a dance in the town, a red-pant dance for lipstick users. I saw the lights without any trouble. I rejected the offers of companionship. I couldn't be sure. The dart throwers were throwing - casual yet prim. It was a serious game. I waited for the dart in the face. Need it be so inevitable? I drew no conclusion - just carried on drinking. I had a wet chin. I wiped it with the sleeve of my velvet coat. Difficult moments. I pondered a little and made a fierce attempt to sort myself out. I knew I looked odd. I worried about it. I had to try and smile. I failed. I farted. The beer and the company were very, very strong
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